The Anxious Girl’s Guide: Finding Your Calm

The Anxious Girl’s Guide: Finding Your Calm

A Teen Anxiety Workbook

$24.99

Most anxiety books are written for anxiety that leaves when the test is over, but this workbook is also for the kind that shows up on normal days and keeps her up at night.

I wrote it after years of hearing teens tell me the techniques work in my office but not when they are actually anxious.

Inside this workbook, she will learn:

  • Which kind of anxiety she has
  • How to calm a spike as it happens
  • How to stop letting anxiety run her day
  • How to get back to sleep at night
Description

An evidence-based workbook for adolescents ages 13 to 18 with anxiety 

Understanding Your Anxiety — Differently 

Most anxiety resources are designed for situational stress — the kind that shows up before a big event and leaves when it's over. But what if your anxiety shows up on perfectly normal days? What if it keeps your brain running at night, doesn't disappear when the situation ends, and feels like it's always quietly running in the background no matter what you do? 

Shipping

Shipping. Included in the price, with tracking. The workbook is printed to order and ships in 3 to 4 business days. Delivery takes another 3 to 5 business days.

Damaged or wrong order. Send me a photograph and I will replace it.

Here’s exactly what Finding Your Calm will show you

Part 1, The Tourist: calming a spike before a test or a party.

Part 2, The Roommate: doing what she wants while anxiety is still there.

Part 3, The Sleep Showdown: getting back to sleep at night.

Part 4, Living with It: a plan for the worst nights.

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What readers tell me

I really liked the weekly quotes and the technique of the month. They encouraged me and at the same time reminded me that I am building skills.
A teen reader
The check boxes and quick prompts make it easy to track my progress and set daily goals.
A teen reader
I walked in on my teen teaching her younger brother the 54321 grounding exercise one day. I am truly thankful for this resource.
A parent

What Finding Your Calm will teach you

Part 1, chapters 1 to 4

The Tourist

For the anxiety that shows up before something she dreads and leaves once it is over.

  • Your Anxiety Journey Starts Here. Where she begins, and how to tell which kind of anxiety she has
  • Welcome to the Noisy Neighborhood. What is going on when anxiety spikes
  • Your Essential Tourist Toolkit. The core techniques for calming a spike in the moment
  • Tourist Maintenance System. How to keep those skills working after the first read
Graph: anxiety rises before the test and falls once it is over

Part 2, chapters 5 to 9

The Roommate

For the anxiety that moves in and stays, showing up on normal days when nothing has gone wrong.

  • Understanding Your Long-Term Resident. Why this kind of anxiety does not respond to the usual advice
  • Advanced Cognitive and Emotional Techniques. Tools for the thoughts and feelings that keep it going
  • Values, Purpose, and Building Support. What matters to her, and who she can lean on
  • Roommate Anxiety Techniques. Practices for living her life while anxiety is still there
  • Roommate Anxiety Maintenance System. A routine that keeps the progress going
The Tourist comes and goes. The Roommate stays all week.

Part 3, chapters 10 to 14

The Sleep Showdown

Five chapters on the nights anxiety gets loudest, when the house goes quiet.

  • When to Call in Backup. How to tell when sleep trouble needs a professional
  • House Rules for Anxious Minds. Simple rules that make sleep easier to reach
  • Bedtime Techniques for Anxious Minds. What to do while trying to fall asleep
  • Middle-of-the-Night Recovery Strategies. How to get back to sleep after waking up anxious
  • Setting Yourself Up for Sleep Success. Daytime habits that help the night go better
Graph: anxiety climbs through the evening and peaks at bedtime

Part 4, chapters 15 to 17

Living with It

For the worst nights, and for keeping everything working long after the book is finished.

  • Emergency Protocols for Crisis Moments. What to follow when anxiety is at its worst
  • Advanced Therapeutic Techniques. Deeper tools for when the basics are not enough
  • Building Your Personal Management System. A plan in her own words that keeps working
Her plan: an emergency plan, deeper tools, and her own system

Perfect for parents, teens, and the professionals who support them

For parents

  • Know which kind she hasThree questions tell you whether it is the Tourist or the Roommate, and why that changes what helps
  • Something to followA plan for the hard nights, so you are not guessing
  • Her pace, her wayShe can work through it alone or with you

For teens

  • Tools for the momentWays to bring a spike down before a test or a party
  • Help getting back to sleepFive chapters on the nights anxiety gets loudest
  • A plan in her own wordsSomething that keeps working after the book is done

For counselors and therapists

  • A shared languageThe Tourist and Roommate framework gives you both the same words
  • Practice between sessionsChapters and exercises she can work on between appointments
  • Evidence-basedBuilt on CBT, DBT, ACT and mindfulness

Frequently Asked Questions

What age is it written for?

Girls aged 13 to 18. The reading level assumes high school.

What if she will not use it?

It does not start at page one. Three questions point her to the chapter for the kind of anxiety she has.

Do I need both?

No. The workbook is the complete method. The planner adds the daily structure.

Can I see inside before I buy?

Yes. The sample is free. It has the preface, how the book is built, and the start of Part 1.

Is this a replacement for therapy?

No. These are the tools used in sessions, written down. They do not replace care from a qualified professional.

Melissa Garvey, LCSW

Hello, I'm Melissa Garvey

I am writing this as both a therapist who specializes in teen anxiety and someone who remembers what it actually felt like to be anxious in school. I wrote Finding Your Calm because the wait for adolescent care in this county is six months and I can only see so many girls a week.

  1. 1Over 18 years treating teen anxiety, almost all of it with girls aged 13 to 18.
  2. 2Ran Monterey County's adolescent intensive outpatient program and helped build the youth mental health center here.
  3. 3Certified in CBT, DBT and clinical trauma levels I and II. MSW, University of New Hampshire.
  4. 4Still in practice in Carmel every week, so the book comes out of current cases.
  5. 5Every year I hear the same sentence: these techniques work in your office, but I can't remember them when I'm actually anxious.

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